My blood on your lips

I've been having an internal debate with myself all day as to whether I should post this or not. It's safe and sound in my journal but I guess I wanted to post this to show just how intensely dreams can affect someone physically as they're dreaming.

This is why sleep paralysis is such an intense experience. People have actually injured themselves (scratches, chipped teeth, other more severe things, even injured others near them) while in the grip of such terror. This is why I think learning to influence and alter such experiences is a wonderful idea and can potentially help people that suffer from this.

 

Usually the first step is to acknowledge that it is or it could be Sleep Paralysis and not a demon sitting on your chest or aliens sticking you with needles. I myself do not know whether I believe in this or not and I often fight with myself over whether or not I believe in supernatural things but once people know that there is something scientific that may explain what they are experiencing, it becomes less terrifying. At least that's how it was for me. Now, I'm slowly learning how to influence it.

Anywho, on to the dream!

 

I was dancing in some sort of dark club. The people around me were all very interesting looking. Some had antlers, others wings, some I can't even describe. It was a rather surreal experience even for a dream. Time felt messed up. I remember the floor was glass or see-through and I could see clouds swirling under us. I was almost afraid I might fall through but I kept dancing any way. A beautiful person sidled up to me and we were dancing close... very close. It was lovely. I felt all flirty and soon someone else joined us and I was lucky enough to be in the middle of these two alien ethereal people.

 

It was like a nightclub circus... there were people swinging from the rafters on vine-covered swings and everyone was dressed in either really flowy things or tight sparkly things. Faces were twisted and distorted with make-up. There was so much going on. It was sensory overload for me. In the center of the ring was a pillow-pit (kind of like what you would find at a gymnasium only filled with pillows instead of foam) in which people and creatures were engaging in... some rather fun looking things... to which I leave to your imagination.

 

I felt like I was looking for someone or that I was late or that I was going to be in trouble but I just couldn't tear myself away from the beautiful people dancing against me. It was hard to get a grip on them. Like with many of my sexy dreams it's like trying to hold onto smoke. I grew frustrated and then suddenly someone caught my wrist and dragged me from the crowd. He was tall and had long dark brown hair but, being a dream person, his face was a conglomerate of faces which I don't really remember. He wore a long dark red trench coat. There was a sense of familiarity and want but also worry because he seemed angry with me. I felt like I was in trouble.

 

He easily captured both of my wrists and pinned me to one of the stone pillars off in a dark corner,

"Just what do you think you're doing?"

I tried to pull away weakly but he held on tightly.

I laughed nervously and replied, "Dancing?"

His laugh was darker and his grin was much wider, "I can see that." His grip only tightend when I tried to break away and a strategically placed leg found it's way between mine only adding to my growing frustration.

"... sorry?"

 

He smirked at my half-hearted apology, "Are you?"

The dream began to fade. Some other things happened which I forget. Things generally tend to get more nonsensical as I drift into consciousness. This is where things got interesting.

I was in my bed, it was still pretty dark but I knew it was my room and I could see my vanity-mirror and dresser with the faint light of the bathroom. I grew aware of something in my room and began to panic. A tall silhouette stood at the foot of my bed watching me. I tried reaching for my knife but in an instant he was on top of me pinning my wrists down.

There was fear but there was also residual frustration which I blame for what happened next. Usually when I don't know that I'm still dreaming the sleep paralysis turns the experience very dark and negative but this time it was different... mostly. The figure became more visible and took on a definite shape; long dark brownish almost black hair and a long dark red trench coat. As I was in a wakeful state yet still dreaming (and might I add, I didn't know I was still dreaming) the sensations were much more vivid and intense than they seem to be in my dreams.

No matter what I did I couldn't move. It was hard to breathe and then he bit me. I tried so hard to move but it was like my limbs were made of lead and it was a struggle just to breath. Even my lips were sealed shut like an envelope. I could feel his teeth digging into my flesh and yes, it did hurt but it also made my toes curl. I'd say we were half and half with fear and want here. He pulled back grinning and revealing blood-stained teeth before craning his neck to kiss me. I tasted blood. I think it was the intensity of the actually tasting blood that brought me all the way back to reality.

I sort of convulsed on the bed (like when you're just falling asleep but then you feel like you're actually falling and you jerk back awake? Yeah...)... lay there panting for a moment, still tasting blood only I realized it had been my own. I had bitten the side of my tongue. Pretty hard too. Still hurts.